Category: Reflections

  • What Children Are Losing in the Race to Succeed

    Words! So many words!!

    Loose and free! Are they? Or are these words linked?

    Why do these words keep whiring in my mind? Perhaps they are more deeply connected than they appear.

    Recently, I came across a statement by Professor Shireesh Kedare, Director of IIT Bombay, in The Indian Express (March 6, 2026):
    “Coaching culture trains students to game the exam rather than build conceptual understanding. This approach doesn’t work in the IIT system.”

    This stayed with me.

    My thoughts wandered to the many reports of students resorting to self-harm in prestigious institutions, and to similar incidents in cities where coaching centres thrive but young minds quietly struggle. I even recalled a panel discussion I watched years ago, where heads of IITs spoke about the rising number of student suicides on their campuses.

    One remark stuck: many students entering these institutions are those have not read any story books, watched meaningful films, pursued hobbies, or experienced unstructured play. From as early as Grades 6 or 7, they are absorbed into coaching systems. By the time they get here, they are often mentally exhausted, emotionally depleted, and physically inactive.

    They are unprepared—not intellectually, but psychologically—for the journey ahead. For years, their singular goal has been to “get in.” Schools, parents, and coaching systems reinforce this idea.

    I recall a school leader telling Grade 12 students: “Focus on getting into IIT. Once you’re there, life is set.”
    The implication was clear—work relentlessly now, and later you just chill and enjoy life. But reality is very different. And reality hits them hard as nothing, no one prepared them for that.

    Many students discover that the pressure does not ease; it intensifies. Without genuine interest in their field, without emotional resilience, and without a broader foundation of experiences, they struggle to cope.

    As Professor Kedare also points out in the same idea exchange that some students arrive driven more by the brand value of institutions than by thrir passion for learning. When faced with academic and personal challenges, they falter. He adds that he has seen students spiral—one, for instance, turned to excessive gaming and failed most first-semester courses.

    This forces us to question the cost are we chasing success.

    It is natural for parents to want the best for their children. But should childhood be sacrificed at the altar of coaching classes? Too often, we hear heartbreaking accounts of children apologizing to their parents for “failing” them—just before taking irreversible step.

    Parents may not fully grasp the immense pressure their children carry, or how fragile their mental health can become under it.

    So what can be done?

    First, we must stop placing the entire weight of expectations on young shoulders. Children need time— for studies, and for life.

    Time to play.
    Time to explore hobbies.
    Time to simply be.

    Free play is not a luxury; it is essential. It supports emotional regulation and contributes to mental strength. Physical activity is equally critical—it nurtures both body and mind.

    I know of a parent who once said, “She can play after her Class 12 exams. There’s no point wasting time now.”
    But is play really a waste of time?

    Is it not fundamental to healthy development? Can children truly excel academically if their physical and emotional needs are neglected? Childhood is a critical period of growth—what is missed then cannot be fully recreated later.

    Watching reels or playing video games is not the same as running outdoors, playing a sport, or engaging with peers. Through sports and play, children learn to solve problems, follow rules, handle victory and defeat, negotiate, collaborate, and persist. They learn resilience, they thrive.

    And yet, while we speak often about social-emotional learning, we rarely give children the space to experience it.

    Many parents also dismiss stories, poetry, theatre, or the arts as distractions. “What’s the use?” they ask.

    Oh, the use is profound!

    Stories build imagination.
    Poetry deepens emotional awareness.
    The arts cultivate empathy, reflection, and self-expression.

    These experiences shape individuals who are not only academically capable, but also socially aware, emotionally intelligent, and truly prepared for life.

    If we want our children to flourish and not just succeed—we must rethink what we value.

    Now let’s turn to the words we read in the beginning. Those are not separate after all.They are threads of the same fabric.

    Your thoughts? 🗨️

    🌸Let‘s connect on👇

    Instagram

  • Trust Your Transformation

    Daily writing prompt
    Jot down the first thing that comes to your mind.
    View all responses

    The first thing that comes to my mind as I read this prompt is a quote I stumbled upon this morning—

    It instantly brought someone to my mind. Someone going through a difficult time, nursing a heartbreak, weighed down by disappointment, struggling to move forward through the negativity.

    I shared this thought with her, hoping it would remind her that even in the darkest phases, something meaningful is possibly taking shape beneath the surface.

    We often celebrate growth when it’s visible—when the transformation is complete. But we rarely talk about the in-between: the confusion, the self-doubt, the negativity, the waiting…

    Research in positive psychology supports this unseen phase of growth. The concept of post-traumatic growth, introduced by psychologists Richard Tedeschi and Lawrence Calhoun, suggests that people can experience profound personal development after adversity. It’s not the pain itself that transforms us, but the way we process, reflect and rebuild. 🤍☁️🌿🍃✨️

    And yet, while research gives us language for this transformation, living through it is messy.

    And it’s not just about heartbreak. It could be any loss, any setback, any moment where life feels heavier than usual. These are the times when faith feels fragile and hope feels elusive—but they are also the moments that shape our better version.

    Growth happens in the dark too! Save this for difficult days when it feels overwhelming. ⋆.˚🦋༘⋆

    🌸Let‘s connect on👇

    Instagram

  • The Learning Mindset: Finding Wisdom Everywhere

    ꜛ The above quote resonates deeply with me. It suggests a powerful yet simple idea: we can learn something from everyone we meet. The only requirement is where we choose to place our focus. If we train ourselves to notice strengths, qualities, and positives in others, every interaction becomes an opportunity for growth, IF, if we “have a heart that watches and receives” (expression borrowed from the great english poet William Wordsworth)

    ›This way of thinking closely aligns with the essence of positive psychology—a strength-focused approach. What we focus on grows. If we train our eyes to see gems, the world begins to feel richer, wiser, and more generous.

    › At the same time, learning is not just about others—it is about our willingness to be taught. If you are truly willing to learn, every experience and interaction—whether positive or negative—holds a lesson. But for that, one must be teachable. When we cultivate that openness, the entire universe becomes our teacher.

    ›In his poem ‘The Tables Turned’ William Wordsworth captured this beautifully when he wrote, “Let nature be your teacher.” He believed that:

    ❝One impulse from a vernal wood
    May teach you more of man,
    Of moral evil and of good,
    Than all the sages can.    ❞

    ∗(From: The Tables Turned) These lines remind us that wisdom is woven into the world around us.

    ››As I write, I’m reminded of a poem I encountered in school, probably in the fifth grade. At that age, perhaps we are too young to fully grasp its depth, yet the message quietly stays with us. Meaning unfolds, as we grow. The image below is found on the internet.

    ››I sum up the main idea that the poem conveys. It draws lessons from nature in the most beautiful way. The mountain, standing tall and firm, teaches us to hold our heads high—to be grounded, resilient, and unwavering in our values. The ocean, vast and deep, reminds us that our thoughts, too, should have depth, encouraging us to think critically rather than remain superficial.

    ›The earth, patient and enduring, teaches us to carry our responsibilities without complaint. And the sky, limitless and expansive, inspires us to grow beyond boundaries—to embrace a perspective wide enough to include the whole world.

    🎯The poem is really about developing essential life skills.🪴 It speaks of courage—the courage to stand for what is right. It nurtures assertiveness, resilience, and the ability to think deeply. It encourages problem-solving and thoughtful decision-making. And above all, it fosters empathy—the kind that allows us to consider every soul on this planet.

    ›Perhaps the lesson is simple yet profound: if we are willing to learn, teachers are everywhere. In people. In experiences. In nature. In life itself. 🌿⚘.⋆🍃༄

    ✍️ Over to you: What’s your take? Share your thoughts in the comments below! 💬

    🌸Let‘s connect on👇

    Instagram

    Facebook

  • Born With X Factor

    🌸 Here’s to the women pave the way for future generations, who provide both roots and wings!

    🍃On March 8, we celebrate the X — the mark of creation. Beyond biology lies brilliance, the quiet strength, the capacity. The capacity to nurture without losing strength, to lead with empathy, to raise emotionally secure children.

    It’s about power — expressed with grace, the soft power. 🍀

    No, we don’t compete for power. We are power. Before you disagree let me elaborate my point.

    Let’s bring genetics into the conversation. X chromosome contains significantly greater number of genes. Then, certain conditions (mitochondrial) can be inherited down the maternal line only.

    🍃Well, leave the genetics aside and consider socialization. Although fathers’ involvement in child-rearing is increasing, yet studies indicate that, on average, mothers spend significantly more time on direct childcare and daily routines compared to fathers. Understandably, mothers have a greater impact on their children’s behavior, attitudes, and personalities. So, until the time men take equal share of child rearing responsibilities, women would continue to lead not just support.

    Oh, does this sound divisive?  Allow me be an unapologetic feminist today 🙂 Happy Women’s Day! 💐

    🌸Let‘s connect on👇

    Instagram

    Facebook